So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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