I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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