What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
