Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
There's even glitter on my cock...
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