so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize