uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
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