Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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