Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
