What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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