Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Randomize
