You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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