i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Randomize
