He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
