so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I'm like, not good at living.
Randomize
