if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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