I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
