A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
She bit a glass in half.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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