Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
