Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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