Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
