So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize
