My brain says no but my pants say off.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
