ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Actions speak louder than pants.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
You took a bar mat shot.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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