i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Randomize
