thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
