Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
