I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
he fucked my hip out of place.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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