no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
