Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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