Me. At least after what I've been through.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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