Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
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