idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I'm too high and old for this...
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
