I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
