we're chasing vodka with high fives
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
