Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
