It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
