My pussy is not your playground.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
