I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
