3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
