We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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