her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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