i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
