I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
