What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize