Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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