marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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