im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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