i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
