Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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