im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
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